Why not be me?

Growing up I remember the nursery rhyme titled What are Little Girls Made of? As found in The Baby's Opera by Walter Crane (circa 1877). Part of it reads;

What are little boys made of? What are little boys made of? Frogs and snails, and puppy-dogs' tails; That's what little boys are made of. What are little girls made of? What are little girls made of? Sugar and spice, and all that's nice; That's what little girls are made of.

This nursery rhyme is a very simplistic way to look at boys, girls, and people in general. People are actually very complex beings and have so many facets to them that we can't narrow them down to a few attributes (whether good or bad). As I sit in my home during this quarantine time. I have had a lot of time to sit and look at myself - like really look at me. The majority of things that would distract me and keep me busy have been closed down and off-limits. I'm sure we've all heard of people who are happy to be inside, and others who are not so pleased. The Bible tells us to be still and know that He is God. Being still and quiet has many advantages. We can be calm and assess where we are, where we have been, and where we would like to go. The distractions and busyness of life can cause us to lose focus and not pursue our purpose for being here, which requires our authentic selves. How do we hold on to our authentic selves when we are told by so many messages that we should be something different than what we are. We see things or people that we like and strive to be like them. Our Western society almost subliminally gives the message that who we are is not good enough. We need to be more like... or we need to change some things about ourselves to look like... or in order for us to be happy, we have to have... We can all fill in the blanks of what these things are to us.

Of course, we all have things that we don't like about ourselves. Whether it is our outer appearance, our lack of ability in some area, or even the fact that we are different (unique). Many times we want to be like everybody else, we want to be seen as "normal". But what is normal? Are we designed to be like everybody else? I have often asked the Lord why He made me a certain kind of way. I have found myself to be naive and gullible in different areas. I haven't been the suspicious type. I laugh at almost any joke, no matter how corny unless I think it is insulting someone, and I love pretty things. I love sports, action and sci-fi movies and music. I also love reading and beaches and mountains. I love babies and children and I love sweets. I find a friend in most people, and I like to think deeply. I like to study the Bible, and write poetry. I love solving math equations and traveling with my children is the ultimate fun thing for me to do. I'm not sure about you, but I have been criticized on many occasions for frankly, being myself. I found myself changing who I was to satisfy other people. But was I really changing myself, or was I just deceiving myself so that others would accept me?

That takes me to the questions, Who am I? and Why am I here? These were questions that I've asked myself my entire life. As a teenager I would get discouraged because I felt that life didn't have much meaning. You are born, you live for a while (experience good and bad things) and then you die. It can be especially hard not to feel this way when you are discouraged to be yourself and live in the God given way that the Lord has made you. In a time of isolation, a person may feel alone. If you don't feel good about yourself, distracting yourself can be a really good coping mechanism. But what happens when all of the distractions are unavailable? How do you deal with yourself? How do you settle on who you are and be happy with you? I have some thoughts that have encouraged me, and I hope will encourage you.

In Genesis 2, it says that when God created man (humankind) it says He formed him out of the dust of the ground (meaning he took his time and put thought into us) and then He put breath in us and we became living souls. We are not here on accident. I am not, and neither are you. In Jeremiah 1:5, The Lord says that He knew us before we were in our mother's womb and in Psalm 139:3 & 14, David said that He formed our inmost being and knit us together in our mother's womb and that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. These are pretty deep statements, to think that before I was even conceived I was in the mind of God. I am actually here on this Earth, at this time, on purpose, because the Creator decided I should be here right now. Not only that, but He made me who I am in every detail. The things I like and hate, the things I'm good at and those not so much, my appearance and mannerisms are all things that were in God's mind for me and what makes me who I am. Jeremiah 29:11 Says the Lord has thoughts toward us, and they are thoughts of peace and not of evil, He gives us a future and a hope.

I was saved as a child and I held on to the young people mentioned in the Bible to encourage me in my life's journey. Samuel, Joseph, Daniel and friends, David, Solomon and Esther. Esther represented such bravery for me. She needed to stand up for her people when the rulers didn't even know that she was apart of those people. Her cousin told her that she was there, in that place and time, for such a time as this. This has always stuck with me because I could have been born to a different family, during a different time period, or in a different country, I could have a different ethnic background or a different gender. But God decided that I would be me, here in this country in this century, in this pandemic. He purposefully put me here.

He put me in different schools growing up so that I could be adjustable and be able to communicate with all kinds of people. He gave me artistry and logic skills so that I could bridge gaps between the two. He put poetry and music in my soul to help me identify with Him and humanity. He put dance in my spirit so that I could stay healthy and enjoy movement. He gave me an eye for beauty so that I can appreciate His creative hand. He gave me the ability to shake things off and allow Him to look out for me instead of me trying to be in control. Zephaniah 3:17 says the He dances over me with joy. He is happy that He made me. He covers me under His wings (Psalm 91:4). He provides for me (Matthew 6:26). He loves to hear me sing and comes close (Psalm 22:3). I am precious and honored in His sight and He loves me (Isaiah 43: 4).

So I know that I am a daughter of the King (2 Corinthians 6;18). I am a princess (1 Pet. 2:9), I am loved (John 3:16). He his not only my father but Abba

(Rom 8:14 - 16). God is true, and I will believe His report about me (Luke 10: 17 - 19). I am free to be myself and not bound by sin (John 8:36). I am more than a conqueror, He is more than the World against me, and Nothing can separate me from His love (Romans 8: 31 - 39). I know that He is working on me (Zechariah 13:9) and that things need to be worked out of me because when we become new creations old things are passed away (2 Corinthians 5:17). I know that all things are possible through Him (Luke 1:37). And I know that the Lord will rescue/deliver me from every evil assault and will bring me safely to His kingdom (2 Timothy 4:18) so I don't have to be all wise and all knowing. I know that He goes before me and behind me, He is over me and under me and I am surrounded by his love. This is who I am. I am here because He ordained me to be here. Therefore, I am going to be content to be myself. I am going to love the person the Lord made me to be. I am going to be available for Him to use as He pleases. I will not be afraid or intimidated to be what He has called me to be (Isaiah 43: 1,2,5). I am going to do my best to bring Glory to Him with my life until He decides it is my time to leave this Earth, because He is my creator, my father and my God.